Dear Seller of the Cute Victorian,
How are you going to sell a house that has a toilet that was installed on the landing of the stairs to the basement? How have you lived with that for two years? There is no sink, no shower, no DOOR. The toilet is just off the dining room. In a stairwell. Convenient? I suppose. Bizarre? Definitely.
Dear Seller of the White House in West Denver,
Your house smells like stinky standing water. The floor is buckled and squishes when you step on it. People who walk into the house think it's gross. The kitchen is horrendous. The gutters had weeds growing in them--the realtor said he'd never seen that before. All that for the low, low price of $225,000!
Dear Seller of the Rowhouse in West Denver,
I'm kind of wishing now that we'd put an offer in. Now that I've seen what we can afford, your little bundle of cuteness is looking better than ever. Not that I'm wishing bad things for you, but I'm kind of hoping the contract falls through and we can have another shot at it.
With Kind Regards,
Beulah
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